bedtime follies. a drama in three acts. playing every night.

I

The scene opens with four children all tucked in bed for the night.

Helen: but Daddy, why can't I sleep in my princess dress? isn't that how a princess should sleep??

Thomas is out of bed. Tim puts him back in but he won't stay.

Tim: Thomas, you'll have to sleep in your crib if you can't stay in the big boy bed.

Thomas: (hysteria)

Tim: ok, I'll give you grace this time. Back in bed, I'll tuck you in.

Thomas (complying surprisingly quickly): ok daddy, where are my grapes?

Peter: waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

II

Helen: HELP! HELP! HELP!

Tim goes in to find that Thomas has somehow sneaked into the big kids room and wiggled into her bed. Back in his bed he goes.

Thomas: grapes, daddy! I want the grapes! where are the grapes?

George (gets out of bed): Mommy, I have a big problem.

Me: what's that?

George: I need to know the difference between a hotel and a motel.

Peter: waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

III

George (gets out of bed): I have another problem!

Me, with a sigh: What is it now?

George: I have an itchy tooth. And I can't scratch it.

Thomas (sadly): grapes? grapes?

Peter: waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!